Food fight
by Awakenedrose
Summary: This is just a one shot. Based in Dragon age Awakenings. While commander Lyna Mahariel works on paperwork, sit and eat dinner, and then a food fight starts.


_Okay this is a one shot just for fun. I takes place in Awakening. By the way I do not own anything. I hope you enjoy! Please be kind :)_

Lyna had so much stress on her shoulders. Always the first one up, last one to eat, and last one to go to bed. She was in her room looking over documents while Nathaniel , Anders, Oghren, Sigrun, and Velanna sat down eating their dinner. Nathaniel, and Anders sat across from Orghen and Sigrun, while Velanna sat at a small table by her self behind Orghren and Sigrun. In the middle of the table, sat a big pot of stew for them to help themselves too.

"Hopefully Commander comes down before this stew is gone. It's really good." Sigrun said as she ate her stew.

"There's still plenty in the pot." Nathaniel said looking in the pot in he middle of the table.

"How can you say this thick pasty goo is good?." Velanna asked as she picked up her spoon to let the stew slide back in her bowl.

"Have you tried it?" Nathaniel said.

"No and I don't intend to." Velanna said staring at her bowl picking her spoon up letting the stew drop back in her bowl. "I don't understand how humans prefer to eat something that looks like the mud we walk through."

"Just try it, you might actually enjoy it." Anders said as he winked at her.

Velanna glared at Anders. She took her spoon dipped it in her bowl. Scooped up enough stew on the tip of it, and put it in her mouth. "There! I tried it! happy?" Velanna scowled.

"You call that a bite?" Anders asked. "My cat eats bigger bites than that. Get a big scoop and really dig in."

Velanna sighed and rolled her eyes. She did what Anders said and scooped enough to fill her spoon. She put the spoon in her mouth and swallowed.

"Well?" Anders asked.

"Not what I usually prefer to eat, but it's edible." Velanna said as she ate her stew.

"How come Commander never eats with us?" Sigrun asked.

"She's looking over documents." Nathaniel said "I offered to help but she said she doesn't need any."

Oghren shook his head "That's too much for me to handle. I'll stick to killing dark spawn."

"I'm surprised you even know how to read." Anders said.

"Shut your mouth Sparkle Fingers!" Oghren yelled. "And get that cat off the table! That's disgusting letting him eat out of the same bowl as you."

"Ser Pounce a lot is hungry," Anders said giving the cat some of his food. "What's disgusting is that you don't ever wash your hands before you eat."

"I'm not eating my hands Sparkle Fingers! It's better than sharing a dish with an animal after it licks his butt!"

Sigrun couldn't help but spit her drink out and cough. "Do you two mind?" She asked " I'm trying to eat here."

"Yes I agree." Velanna said sternly. "It's disturbing enough to be around you two, not alone your filthy manners."

"For your information cat's have the cleanest tongues. His mouth is still cleaner after he gets done licking his butt than Oghren's mouth ."

"Seriously stop." Sigrun said "I'm going to lose my appetite."

"Since you don't mind a cat eating out of your dish allow me," Oghren said as he dipped his finger into Anders bowl. Oghren licked his finger and chuckled.

Anders looked at his bowl and then him. "Well since you helped yourself, perhaps you'd like alittle bit more." Anders said with sarcasm as he flicked a spoonful at Oghren's face. Oghren's expression went from laughing to a stern glare as the stew ran down his face.

"You really shouldn't have done that Sparkles." Oghren mumbled. Everyone else stopped eating and just stared.

"You didn't get enough? Here, have a little bit more." Anders said as he flicked another spoonful at Oghren.

Oghren still glaring at him, not even flinching with stew dribbling down his face into his beard.

"I'll bet that will stay in your beard for quite awhile since you lack of bathing." Anders snickered.

"Probably longer than this." Oghren took his bowl and dumped it in Anders lap. Oghren busted out laughing.

"You said cat's have the cleanest mouths, well there you go. Have Ser what's his face give you a bath." Oghren said laughing.

Anders took his bowl and threw it at Oghren's armor. The stew splattered which hit Sigrun in the side of her face.

"Hey!" She said wiping her hand glaring at Anders.

Anders smirked "Hey look Nate! The Dwarves match…" before he could finish , a spoonful of stew splattered right in his face.

"There! Ser Pounce a lot will be busy cleaning you for awhile!" Sigrun giggle and then she saw Anders grabbed a ladle full of stew and flung it at her. She ducked as the stew flew by her, hitting the back of Velanna's neck. Velanna cruinged her shoulders as the stew ran down her back. Velanna slowly turned around and glared.

"I can not believe how disgusting you humans and dwarfs are! You people make me sick!" She growled. Before she could get another word out Sigrun flung stew at her face and it ran down her chin, down her neck, into her cleavage.

"Oh lighten up Velanna!" Sigrun said. "It's just stew. It's not going to kill you!" She started to giggle.

"No but I'm going kill you here in a minute!" Velanna growled with her arms out and looking down at herself. Anders stared and admiring as the stew ran down into her cleavage.

"Velanna my dear?" Anders said. "You have something...dribbling down your chin...into your ummmm" He tapped his chest. "Perhaps if I may help you clean up..."

"Keep your filthy human hands to yourself Anders!" Velanna growled.

Anders stood up and started walking towards her, holding a napkin. "Come on Velanna. Let me rub it off before it stains your clothes."

Velanna stood up. "Stay away from me Anders!" She grabbed her bowl and threatened to throw it at him.

"Go ahead! I don't care." He said as he crept up on her. She threw the bowl, Anders stepped out of the way, Oghren ducked and the stew splattered all over Nathaniel.

Oghren just laughed and laughed.

"That's! It!" Nathaniel yelled, and put his hand in the spot and started throwing the stew Velanna and Sigrun.

All of them, Sigrun, Velanna, Nathaniel, and Orghen kept dipping their hands in the pot and tossed the stew at each other. Finally Ogrhen grabbed a big hand full.

"Here ya go! Why don't you choke on that for a while!" He yelled as he started smearing stew into Velanna's face. But he looked over and saw Velanna on one side him and Sigrun on the other side. He looked behind him and saw Nathaniel and Anders just gasping as they stared at him. He looked confused for a second still his hand on the face he hasn't looked at yet. Then his eyes opened wide. Ancestors please don't let this be the Commander he thought. He slowly turned his head to the face, slowly removed his hand. There stood a rogue elf wiping her eyes and spitting out what Oghren shoved in her face.

"Commander are you okay?" Anders asked.

Lyna took a deep breath and spoke slowly. "I know it's been rough here at the keep for the past month...I've been pushing everyone to their limits... and for that I will only say this once...clean yourselves up, and had back to your rooms...I do not want to see any of you for the rest of the night."

She grabbed a bowl, walked over to the pot while everyone is staring at her, dipped her bowl in the pot of stew, grabbed a spoon and started walking towards the stairs to her room. Everyone else started to sigh with relief thinking thank goodness she didn't rip them apart. Lyna turned back around to face tem

"A fair warning to you all. Do not think I will be calm if this behavior happens again! Do I make myself clear?" She growled.

Everyone slowly nodded and grumbled yes Commander.


End file.
